Mysteries Around The Corner

Hard not to miss these signs, right?

Hard not to miss these signs, right?

After what has been a fulfilling summer where I was able to find some moments to unwind, just like you (probably), I am returning from summer plugged into my device way more than I want to be — focusing on the news, my calendar, work, and preparing for the general whirlwind that is September. Thankfully, though, I got a wake-up call over the weekend that reminded me just how important it is to pay attention. And I don't mean to your phone. I'm talking about your surroundings.  

My husband, Marc, grew up spending his summers in Niantic, Connecticut (20 minutes from Mystic, for all you Mystic Pizza lovers). Every time I coached over Skype from the cottage this summer, it came up that I was not in my usual Brooklyn office, but instead I was in Niantic. Much to my surprise, three clients in one week had not only heard of this small shoreline town, but had actually travelled there for the sole purpose of visiting the same main attraction that I had heard of but never thought twice about. Oh, and it happens to be a 3-minute drive from our house: The Book Barn. 

Book Barn Sign.jpg

It’s like the Niantic Starbucks for Used Books — there are four locations all within a half-mile. I always said I'll check it out sometime. Maybe on my next visit. Or the next year. Truth was, I already had a favorite bookstore in another town nearby, so it never seemed important to check this one out. But you know that moment when enough people you trust mention the same place or book or tv show, and you are like, “Okay….now I’m tuning in?” That happened to me on Friday. On a quick break in between coaching sessions, our friend Dave and his girlfriend Elizabeth had stopped by the house to say hi, and in the two minutes I saw them, they shared how they were in town on their way home from Cape Cod, specifically to check out…you guessed it...The Book Barn.

Okay universe, I GET IT. It’s time to get my booty to The Book Barn. Perfect rainy day activity. Off I go the next day with my family.

Lo and behold, this place is out of this world! It was like I walked into some crazy mix of my childhood library and my beloved summer camp: old, weathered, full of endless nooks and crannies, with chairs and couches to plop into and even a goat chillin' in the yard. I was transported back to a time where technology was not yet a thing on my mind, and certainly not yet a source of addiction. I was in heaven. Each book in this place is like the Velveteen Rabbit — worn, used and loved. I saw books I grew up with, Zoe picked up books I remember my parents reading to me when I was her age. I instantly melted, remembering the thrill of learning to read for the first time.

Zoe was so into her book she wouldn't look up for the picture.

Zoe was so into her book she wouldn't look up for the picture.

But what really makes this place special? The people inhabiting it. The preschool teacher I met in the kids room who spends every Sunday looking for new books for her classroom while enjoying her morning coffee. The librarian in line speaking to the cashier about what books she is dropping off next week. And the kids running around with the excitement of building a fort of blankets and reading underneath it with a flashlight. Can you picture it yet?

This was perfection to me. I was with my family, no where else to be, exploring all the little gems of this hidden treasure we had discovered together. Even Marc (who was doing me a favor and figured we’d be in and out in 10 minutes) got lost in the cookbook section that seemed to go on for miles. There was no rushing. We were all browsing. Taking our time. Sure, I’ll say that again for all the New Yorkers who need to hear it (including me)...TAKING OUR TIME.

This simple place that we must have driven past hundreds of times rocked my world. Every summer that I’ve come to Niantic, I’ve been busy focusing on family time, going to the beach, doing the routine things or, honestly, reading something on my phone in the passenger seat, not fully paying attention to my surroundings...missing what was right in front of me.

Myseteries Around Corner Sign.jpg

Is the moral of this story, "Get thee to a used bookstore?" Well, yes. Please get out there and let’s all support our local bookstores, am I right?!?

But that’s not the whole point. It happened to be about used books for me. But for you it might be a hike on a trail, or going to a new restaurant, or taking a new class, or listening to a song you have never heard before, or seeing a show you know nothing about, or venturing to a neighborhood you never thought was worth checking out.

The point is to look up. Look up from your phone long enough to see where you are. And then put your phone down and take the time to explore the mysteries around the corner.

Like me, you might just wander into your new happy place that will soon become your new routine. 

See ya in a few weeks, Book Barn!       

Book Barn Thanks for reading Sign.jpg

Striking The Balance

Let’s face it, the summer months require us to let go of any expectation for maintaining our routine.  I love my routine, but I have to admit I also love taking a break from it! As we enter August, perhaps you are returning from vacation or gearing up to travel some more before Labor Day. If you are like me, you are back and forth all summer long, splitting your time between work and travel, which can be wonderful and/or stressful, depending on your experience. However you see it, here are some tips to help you strike the balance this summer between making the most of your vacation time and being productive while at work.  

Featured Artist In Action: Doug Moe

Featured Artist In Action: Doug Moe

I am proud to be featuring a long-time Path Alum, Doug Moe, as our Featured Artist in Action this month. Since Doug took the Path Course back in 2010, he has continued to use the tools and do the work. I always tell folks at the end of the course, this work will be all about your commitment to it, and Doug is a true example of what can happen when you stay committed to using the tools and working with accountability partners, no matter how crazy life gets. Doug and his fab accountability partners have been meeting weekly for years now! I get to meet up with them every 6-12 months for a group session to check in on their progress and do some coaching. I always leave so inspired by this group and what they are creating for their lives and careers! This is what commitment looks like, and yes, it DOES produce results. Doug just published his first book (!!!), Man vs. Child, which he will tell you more about below – and we are super thrilled to see what's next for Doug. Enjoy his interview!

The virtues of practicing

The virtues of practicing

Remember that old saying, "How do you get to Carnegie Hall? Practice, practice, practice." It's so true — one doesn't just decide to become a master musician and then waltz into Carnegie Hall. It takes years (and years...and years) of practicing one's craft to get to that place in the music world. And it's not just musicianship that requires that kind of dedicated practicing — it pretty much applies to any area of life that you want to excel at.

How full is your energy tank?

How full is your energy tank?

Energy is everything. You get that, right? If I told you that your ability to reach your goals was greatly dependent on how you invest your energy, would you be willing to examine HOW your are spending your energy each day? Good. Because you should. I see this constantly with my private coaching clients and in the Path Course. Which is why I created a simple tool for you to gauge your energy called the Energy Evaluation. In just a few minutes, you can take stock of how you're managing your energy and put yourself in a more powerful place because of it.

Goodbye 2016!

Goodbye 2016!

2016. What a year! I've heard so many people (personally and in the media) say that this is one of the worst years in recent memory. And, while 2016 has undoubtedly been a chaotic one (particularly from a social/political POV), I don't want to blanket-statement it with "worst year ever." Like many others, I'm happy to welcome in 2017, but I also have some fond memories from the past year, both personally (watching my daughter grow into this amazing little person) and professionally (I can't tell you how many times I've come out of a coaching session feeling energized and inspired by my clients).

America Ferrera and the Inner Critic

America Ferrera and the Inner Critic

After 12+ years of running my business, it’s clear that when more than three people email me the same article within a 24-hour period, I'm most likely going to be inspired to blog about it and share it with my audience as quickly as possible. That was just the case this past weekend when a number of people forwarded me a piece from the New York Times by actress America Ferrera, where she recounts her long struggle with her Inner Critic. The moment I read it, I knew I had to share it immediately!

#GivingTuesday Gifts from Capes Coaching

#GivingTuesday Gifts from Capes Coaching

Now that the holiday season is officially upon us, I wanted to take some time and "gift" you with three things that I've been really excited to share — a mix of inspiration, practical advice, and advocacy that I hope will bring a little something extra to you over the next month and beyond. So, without further ado...

INTERVIEW WITH FANTASTIC BEASTS' DAN FOGLER

Disclaimer: For those of you who don't know, Dan Fogler is my brother-in-law (he's married to my sister, Jodie). And while I've always been a huge fan and champion of his (both as a person and as an incredibly gifted artist), I'm just beyond thrilled that his latest role (as Jacob in Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them) is one that will bring his one-of-a-kind talents to a worldwide audience.

Let the healing begin

Let the healing begin

Let's just start with the obvious: It's been a tumultuous week. Over the past six months (at the very least), the tension surrounding the presidential election grew increasingly worse on a daily basis until it seemed as if it had reached an untenable peak last Tuesday. Shockingly, things only got worse from there.

Confession: This election wrecked me. I felt as if the foundation of all my ideals as an American, a woman, and a mother came under assault in ways that I'd never imagined. In the aftermath, I've felt deep sadness, frustration, anger, and fear (particularly when it comes to thinking of the results in the context of my 4-year-old daughter, Zoe). Regardless of which side of the coin you fall on, the general mood of the country seems to be one of confusion regarding our future.

6 Reasons why you should have a coach

6 Reasons why you should have a coach

1) YOU’LL GET TOOLS FOR LIVING BETTER.

Plain and simple, you will get tools from your coach on how to bring more of the "Real You" into your life and career. We're talking about tools that include how to:

• Break through to the next level of your career

• Have a difficult conversation

• Prepare for a huge audition

• Get you in the right mindset for the big job interview

• Transition out of a current field or...

• Transition back into the business if you have been out for a while.

Olympic lessons on how to stay driven

Olympic lessons on how to stay driven

The 2016 Summer Olympics just wrapped up on Sunday and this year's games brought us many things: Excitement, inspiration, irritation (there may have been more articles written about NBC's coverage than about the actual Olympians!), and even some controversy (ahem...swimmers...). One thing that remains a constant throughout every Olympiad is the sense of awe that overcomes you when watching the world's most gifted athletes — they seem almost superhuman in their feats. But, the truth is that, beyond their natural talents, the one thing that pushes Olympic athletes to the top is their drive. They want it more than anyone else and are willing to do what it takes to become the best in the world.

Friends with (creative) benefits

Friends with (creative) benefits

In this day and age, we have the ability to share our thoughts and creative endeavors with a vast number of people and receive their input almost instantly. It's one of the benefits of technology that links us together with whomever we choose, whenever we choose to do so. And while it's great to get a wide variety of responses to whatever you're putting out there within a short period of time, there often tends to be a lack of depth and serious thought behind this process. "Easy come, easy go," as they say.

Don't put your career in the corner

Don't put your career in the corner

It’s here. Summer, glorious summer. I think it must be ingrained in us from having summer vacation for at least the first 18 years of our lives, but we generally have a natural tendency to check-out during this time of year. Auto-pilot season, as it were. Now, I’m all for having an extended period of time where we relax a bit more and take up a leisurely pace of life. In fact, it’s probably essential for self-care. But, there’s a difference between relaxing and completely disengaging. If life is going spectacularly for you and you can afford to drop out of it all for months at a time, then by all means — you do you (honestly, who wouldn’t love that luxury??). For everyone else, summer should really be about balance. Chill out, but keep an eye on the horizon.

Are your goals "goal-worthy?"

Are your goals "goal-worthy?"

I want to discuss the difference between setting a goal for something you want vs. setting a goal based on something that you’ve already been working toward. You know, even once we settle on a goal, it’s quite common to question whether it’s the best goal to be focusing on right now, especially if we have other things happening in our lives and careers. I remember a very specific example of coaching someone through this in one of my previous Path classes — Chris, who was setting a goal for his acting career. Chris had booked a handful of national commercials and he came to the Path Course ready to focus on booking jobs in tv and film, as well as commercials. When creating his one year goal, he was questioning whether or not there should be a part of his goal focused on booking more commercials. After I coached him in class, it became clear to Chris that focusing on commercials did not belong in his goal for this upcoming year. How did he know that this part of his goal was not goal-worthy?

You don't have one true calling...and that's just fine!

You don't have one true calling...and that's just fine!

Not so long ago, a client of mine had seen a TED Talk by a writer and career coach named Emilie Wapnick and compelled me to check it out because it was so connected to what we do at Capes Coaching. Whenever I get this kind of recommendation, I always put it on my Action List, knowing that I'll eventually get to it...usually. But, then a curious thing happened — another client suggested the same thing. And then another client. And another. It was like one of those situations where friends of yours keep telling you that you HAVE to meet some other friend of theirs because everyone thinks that the two of you would really hit it off. So, of course, I watched Emilie's Wapnick's TED Talk...and I got what all the fuss was about.